![]() ![]() And THEN, when the incest-baby was born from the tree-that-had-formerly-been-Myrrha (long story), Aphrodite fell in love with it and got into a big fight over who got to be the baby’s lover. There are a lot of stories about her, but I think my favorite is the one where she got so angry that she made a girl named Myrrha fall in love with her own father. Oh but that penis? It landed in some water, and produced “foam” from which emerged Aphrodite. Eventually a bunch of them got together and cut off his penis, after which he either died or disappeared, depending on who you ask. Ouranos was his own stepfather, and had some serious sibling rivalry with his children. Picture a heavy-set Lucille Bluth with earth-powers. As far as I can tell, the first thing she did after having a kid was marry him, and then made more kids so they could fight. Gaia was mother of more or less everyone and everything, which is only one of the reasons her descendants’ family tree is so screwed up. My favorite by far is Momus, God of Blame and Insults, who was kicked out of the clubhouse for insulting (among other things) Zeus’s sex life and Aphrodite’s squeaky sandals. Most of them don’t come up in pop-culture, I think because they were like five-plus generations removed from the Olympians. In order of appearance: Primodial Deitiesīefore there were Gods, there were these God-like anthropomorphized concepts. Just some of the biggest, most important ones. So this is not even close to a full list of Gods and Goddesses, to say nothing of all the demigods, mythical creatures, anthropomorphized-concepts, and other things that show up in Greek mythology. I had to cut it down, and cut it again, and even then I didn’t finish in time – sorry again, by the way. “I’ll just list all the Greek Gods,” I said. UPDATE : I made an updated poster version, with like a dozen extra gods! Buy it here!
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